behind the scenes. :)

BSF. ♥

 my partner in crime.

 my ally.

 my sister.

 my love.

 my bestfriend.

 my twin soul.

my 'SUPERFRIEND' ♥

special thanks to: kuya ralph carmen :)

'you're the best kuya in the world ♥

HS buds, feb19 ♥

“True friends are the ones who never leave your heart, even if they leave your life for awhile. Even after years apart, you pick up with them right where you left off, and even if they die they’re never dead in your heart.”

good ole' days ♥

GFF, doodles ♥, GLUED. ü, whatever! i just miss being an "LK Girl" :) i miss how it is back then, and i miss these girls (who became the pieces of who i am now) so much! :D

Prof Steff. :)

AGAIN. it's been a very long time since i updated this and funny enough, it's during october where many events had happened that i did not post here. :P well, i guess ive been too busy and in addition to that is the presence of my tumblr account.

October was fun. There were 10 days that it wasn't because people i love just had to go to COPAR, but it was all fine na again after they came back. :)

Right now, classes for the second semester have started and I am just so happy. I was not able to enrol for the continuation of my MA this sem, but.. i am now a professor at PHCM, that's why I am just as affected as the students. :)

Yesterday was my first day and it was really fun. :) During my first class, I entered the room late while the students were laughing and chatting and they did not mind me.. until i went directly to the teacher's table and told them to stand up so we can pray. I heard the young students say "akala ko estudyante". :)) During class, I saw other students outside the classroom, looking at me saying "grabe, ang bata nga!".

After I introduced myself to the students and told them I was instructed not to tell them my age as some of them are even older than me, one male student asked: maam steph, nkapag-debut na po ba kayo? -- ARYYYT! :) haha.

What amazes me is that young as I look, the students were all so attentive. They listen to what I say and threw compliments at me pa before they left. :) I guess I will enjoy this job a lot. :)

HRH ♥

"misery is for the common people, not for princesses."

- queen elizabeth II

think..

if you think making up stories about me can make people believe that i am that kind of person you’re talking about, it probably can. if you think imitating me will make it look like we are of the same level, it probably will. but if you think you can PULL me down, compete with me, make me play the kind of dirty games you play and give up.. THINK AGAIN! :)

because of you :(

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you 

Political Will or Arrogance?

By Sonnie Santos, Blog Watch

P.Noy got mixed reviews from his first press conference after the proclamation. The nation witnessed a leader who can display political will, but others thought that this was arrogance.

The resolution of the incoming President to replace Bangit has been viewed by some as arrogance because of how the matter was handled by his camp. The people surrounding P.Noy has been lambasting the appointment of Bangit and called for his resignation, lest he may be relieved. While there is no question that P.Noy has the prerogative to hire and fire, and to chose people who enjoy his trust, there is a "professional" way to do it.

What is wrong with Bangit?

Except from the person who appointed him, and his statement given to media, as a soldier, what crime did he commit that merits public humiliation?

Yes, he may have opted to submit his courtesy resignation and avoid heading on with the incoming President, but again, there is a professional and dignified way of requesting a person, who served our country and risked his life to protect our territorial integrity and democracy, to step down. I believe we owe respect and honorable exit to public servants who served their country well and committed no crime. Likewise, civilian supremacy is not an excuse to disrespect the military.

In "change management" we are not only dealing with processes and machines but also people. Processes and machines can be upgraded and replaced anytime and expect no direct consequences. But people have emotions. People have friends and families, they have spheres of influence. While Gen. Bangit may have handled the embarrassment professionally [so far], and may opt to just fade away, we can not expect the same reaction from his friends and relatives. People may have chosen to be quiet right now, pero sabi nga nila eh "bilog ang mundo".


Because of this, the Aquino administration may have to regularly watch its back. The time and resources that will be spent on issues like this is better channeled to free the country of corruption, as promised in his campaign.

---

I find Noynoy's pronouncements on this issue very shallow to the point of sounding petty and petulant -- at 50, he still talks and reasons like an 11-year-old brat. Just because Gen. Bangit was appointed by Pres. Arroyo -- for whom he has no love lost, and appointed allegedly past the election ban deadline -- Noynoy is singling out the military chief for his petty revenge at Arroyo. Bangit would not have risen to a general's rank if he has not laid his life on the line countless times while on the battlefield as a young soldier, or sent his men to battle knowing that some of them would not come back alive. Bangit is a real-life hero already. He has proven himself. Noynoy still has to make his name. Can't he show some respect instead of signs of vengeance, vindictiveness, grandstanding and immaturity? He should remember that despite his wide lead over Erap, he was elected as a minority president -- meaning 6 out of 10 Filipinos wanted someone else to lead them. A dose of humility would do him a lot of good as this nation's leader in the next 6 years.

plans.

work has officially started. miss dependent, no more. :)

right at this moment i am defining T-I-R-E-D! :|

but really having a good time, enjoying work and very happy meeting new people and professionals. :)

still undecided whether to enroll this sem in order to continue my graduate school studies or file LOA for the mean time.one thing is certain, i am going to finish my MS HRM at any expense, as in NO MATTER WHAT. i just don't know when. :P haha

i also have plans of taking up paralegal. have to inquire when classes would start soon. it's like a law school or something. i'll be taking up all law subjects but i will not be an "attorney" but a legal consultant. and if i do like it, i'll pursue law na din. :)

soo. goodluck tlga STEF!

15 things.

affirmation.

yea, i'm a bitch. coz if i was a slut like you, i'd be so easy. :))

oh my, GLUED! :)

pic taken during the finals game (1) of the LK guys, also known as "WALASTIK". :)

game was supposed to be at 6.30, but SK officials acknowledge Filipino time so the game started na at 8.30, which became the reason why yiam, fats and i had to go home during the half-time.. not allowing us to witness the chaos. :P haha

missed them so much. hope to do this a lot more often. :D

officially a fairview girl. :D

moved out of veterans village last sunday (may 16) to transfer to a newly-built, bigger and more colorful house in an exclusive subdivision in fairview. admittedly, it's been hard adjusting. especially that i got used to getting all my needs in mere seconds since everything we need back then used to be steps away.

i super miss my friends in vetville. but i am happy that we still manage to keep in touch. i am now closer to yiam's house (in bulacan) but almost an hour away from the others.

we did not have internet connection for a week since we had to do requests of this and that for transfers/billing address and the like. so here's a list of the changes that happened and what ive done/ been doing over the week.

* i now cannot sleep with lights off. haha :)) really, it scares me that i am living in a house that has not been blessed yet.
* been crying every night, thinking of thw what-used-to-be's.
* been taking a bath almost 5 times a day. i really don't know why.
*been sleeping early (10pm) and waking up at 9am. so not me.
* been busy attending job interviews, having a hard time choosing which job will fit me and my interests and which is the most convenient.
* been making friends with neighbors. :P


- i was able to watch several basketball games of my vetville friends.
- attended their victory party.
- attended annika's birthday party (which was on the same day).
- co-authored a new love team (yiam and ron). haha

pretty funny.

what's funny with the news today? noynoy doesn't want to take the oath of office from CJ Corona. he has begun his downward spiral because of ignorance, vindictiveness, and incompetence. he is not yet commander-in-chief and he demands who the outgoing president chooses to lead in the judiciary. oh! and don’t blame me, I did not vote for him. :))

i get needy.

I don’t have a fear of commitment - I have a fear of abandonment. We all screw things up; I screw things up, especially with the people I love. I get needy, I get moody, I get distant, I want to be too close, I get confused. I don’t understand all of it but I keep pushing because I hope in this thing - the universe. There’s no way I’m the only person out there who wants something this bad. If I want it, someone else out there must, too.

Mother Teresa

“People are unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. Love them anyway. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Do good anyway. If you’re successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway. The biggest person with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest person with the smallest mind. Think big anyway. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. People really need help but may attack if you help them. Help people anyway. Give the world the best you have and you might get hurt. Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.”

we missed the flight. BUT HE GAVE US HOPE. :)

As I write this, I am holding back tears. It is not because I don't like Noynoy Aquino, nor because I think Erap being allowed to run again and now come second in this race is a joke, but because about 90% of my voting countrymen allowed a good thing slip through their fingers... yet again.

I read a comment someone posted on the GT fan page that said the Philippines will never cease to be a third world country, because the Filipinos keep thinking like one. It's a tragedy that we repeatedly refuse to acknowledge our islands' limitless potential. By electing the same kind of people over and over again to lead our nation, we are consciously closing our minds and hearts to a new era in politics; where mudslinging and dirty tactics can become obsolete. It really is a shame.

Sour graping is the easiest thing in the world. I could whine, complain and write angry hate notes and messages about how stupid, inane and terrifically idiotic we've now made ourselves out to be. I could congratulate the 12 million Filipinos for damning us to 6 years of shame, blame and online games. There are so many delightfully snarky things I could say that would probably make me feel better. But this time, I won't. Why? Because this time, I've learned how to.

Throughout his campaign, Gilbert Teodoro was often praised by many, both in the public and private sectors, for his brilliance, integrity, capability and positivity. It was due to these qualities that he received support from me and over 3 million Filipinos across the country. Though we did not soar as high as we wanted to, it was in the few feet above the ground that I, and I'm sure my fellow "Gibonians" will concur, learned valuable lessons in politics, leadership and more importantly, in life.

Of these lessons, here are 10 that I will always remember... and treasure.

1. Stop the negativity! Take responsibility! One of the things Gibo was most commended for was his commitment to maintain a positive campaign throughout the period. Not once did he stoop down to sling the mud back, he would only wipe it off his shoes. His focus was on bringing his voice and platform to all areas of the country, to give us the chance to discern and make the decision based on that knowledge. No matter how dirty the arena had become, everyone still wanted to shake his hand.

2. The world keeps spinning and so should we. "Society does change." Gibo said this in one of his sorties, when he talked about addressing the material needs of people today. In an ideal society, people should be content to live within their means and capabilities. But unfortunately, reality begs to differ. The times, they are a changing, Bob Dylan once sang, and it will continue to do so whether we like it or not. The ability to adapt and adjust can no longer be considered an option, for it is fast becoming a necessity.

3. It's not the what. It's the how. Another thing Gibo was often praised for was his practical take on traditional and modern day issues. His platform attracted many because his proposed policies and solutions seemed "doable". In fact, there were no promises made to put an end to the problems that have been haunting our country for decades, if not centuries. After all, an idea is one thing, but its execution is another entirely.

4. Not all bad grass come from the same seed. We civilians have this idea that all government officials are the same: corrupt, self-serving and power hungry. But after listening to Gibo speak in one of his sorties about how corruption can be eased through incentives and rewards for good behavior, I realized that there still are public servants who actually WANT to serve the public.

5. Shit happens. But you can always clean it up. Throughout his stint as Secretary of National Defense happened two tragedies: the Typhoon Ketsana and Maguindanao massacre. His response to these disasters, while not perfect, was still commended by those who actually knew what the heck was going on. Even during the campaign, when many a time was he frowned upon for these unfortunate events, not once did I hear him point the finger at other people. What I admire is that he took responsibility for his actions and did what was best at the time to appease each situation.

6. There are many things we can compromise. Integrity is not one of them. Being a member of one of the most powerful political machineries in the country, it would have been easy to engage in the crossfire that happened between several of the candidates. Everyone wondered why he refused to denounce his ties to PGMA, even though people were saying they would vote for him if he would. Why not compromise, I, like many other Filipinos thought? Then, during one of his sorties, I heard him say that there is nothing on earth that is worth ruining his father's name, and his son's future. Right then and there, I understood.

7. Freedom, contrary to its root word, is not always free. So don't waste it. We are the only fully democratic country in our region, yet, we are one of the least progressive. This is something I've heard him stress over in many talks and forums. We actually have the right to say when we want change and when we've had enough. Sometimes, we don't appreciate how lucky we are, that we have the freedom of speech, the freedom to choose our religion and elect our leaders. It's up to us to make decisions for our future and the betterment of country. And luckily, it will ALWAYS be up to us.

8. Peace, on the other hand, is always free. So please make use of it. One of the main points of Gibo's platform was, and always will be, peace and unity among our 7,000++ islands. We are a diverse archipelago, rich in culture and heritage, and that is something we should be proud of, not hate. We often hear of the problems in other poor countries when in fact, we have the very same problems right next door. Though it is a very popular answer among aspiring beauty queens, that doesn't make it any less crucial. Peace should always be a priority in this, and any country.

9. The importance of a legacy. Of all the times I've heard him address the people's fear of him playing a puppet to PGMA, Gibo always says one thing: that he is still young. What he meant by this was that if he had been given the chance to lead, after his 6 years in office, he would still have many years to show face for; which he would not jeopardize for his sake, and more importantly, for his family's sake. After all, we can think of many ways to gain money and power, but we only have ONE life to live and ONE legacy to leave.

And last...

10. Love our country. This may be the simplest lesson, but nonetheless, it was something I deeply needed to relearn. In this day and age, we are more exposed to the outside world than ever. I'm not scared to admit that there have been a number of times when I felt ashamed of being a Filipino, in a country so afraid of change and innovation. Ashamed of our penchant for favoring people for who they know over who they are. Ashamed of our blatant backwardness, especially when compared to our neighboring countries. But the moment I heard Gibo speak about his vision for the country stirred in me a feeling of patriotism that I never thought I had. In the few months that I displayed my belief in his candidacy; I had also, willingly, displayed my belief in my country.

Despite the grief I feel for the outcome of this year's elections, strangely, I cannot escape the feeling of hope and pride that continues to swell inside me. Looking through the facebook pages of fellow "Gibonians", it's easy to see that there was something new, exciting and inspiring that was born out of all this. And I know that whatever was awakened in all of us is something that cannot be easily abandoned, or forgotten.

Though he's said before that this is the last time he expects to run for public office, I sincerely hope that for once, he said something he didn't mean. I hope, no, I insist that he runs again in 2016, because he owes all of us the opportunity to see his platform, ideas and vision become our reality. Throughout his campaign, we were introduced to a new breed of politics and contrary to what the new first lady (sorry, it slipped) has said, the Green Team volunteers were NEVER paid.

So Mr. Teodoro, if you ever get to read this, please consider giving us the chance to vote for you again. That is the only payment I seek.

Oh yeah, and thanks for the lessons. :)

(http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=391346557129&id=579555170)

mom's day. :)

okaay. planned this the afternoon before mother's day. my sisters rosanna and stella left for batangas yesterday (with my tita) and totally forgot about mother's day. they only realized it when they were already there. haha. :P

shoti, raziel, stacey and i had to wake up at 5am to accomplish everything. we knew she'd be waking up early today coz dad's leaving for bulacan at 7. as we were dividing task, mom went down to go to the comfort room and saw the four of us awake - with no reason. coz the moment we heard foot steps, we put all the food (uncooked yet) under the table. :P she asked us why we were so up early and we were like: uuhh, it's hot, we can't sleep. then she went up to go back to sleep. whew!

raze was in charge of the preparation of the foods we need to cook. i was in charge of the frying (hotdog and bacon) and the food presentation. stace was assigned to cook the sinangag, and shoti the run man. :) everyone cooperated even if we all feel like going back to sleep. after 10mins since mom went up, we heard foot steps again and thought mom could not go back to sleep na. good thing it was our dad. haha :) he was just as excited as we are to give the surprise to our mom.

 after preparing everything, we went upstairs and woke her (mom) up. :) she did not see what was in our hands and went back to sleep, so we shouted "weeehhh". she looked at us again, saw everything and said: thank you. i love you. :)) aaawww!

"Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children." - Willian M. Thackeray

 

HEEY.

a message for Y-O-U. :))

(excerpts from a song)

watcha been doin? watcha been doin?

been long since ive seen you around

how you've been feeling? how you've been feeling,

that you can't bring me down?

all that stuff about me,
can't believe
all the lies that you told,
just to ease your own soul.
but i'm BIGGER than that,
no, you don't have my back,

hey, how long till the music drowns you out?
don't put words up in my mouth.

hey, how long till you face what's goin' on,
cause you really got it wrong.

i'm a mess girl for sure,
but all i want is some fun,

"Hollywood" sucks you in,
but "it" won't spit me out,
Whoa Whoa,
(*let "hollywood" represent something else, e.g. good friends/fame)

hey, how long till you look at your own life,
instead of looking into mine?

hey, how long till you're leaving me alone,
don't you got somewhere to go?